• When I thought about reviewing Noby Noby Boy, the first thing I thought was that everyone would review this unusual gem the usual way, with a score, and all that crap. Well lets leave that kind of thing to the IGN’s, GameSpots, and 1Up’s of the world. Instead, I asked a friend’s 4-Year-Old daughter a few distilled questions about the game.

    Her words are blockquoted and my questions are in bold. Occasionally, she performed nonverbal actions, those are in italics.

    What is “Noby Noby Boy”?

    It’s a game. Noby Noby Boy! (Does a jump.) You eat stuff and poop it out. You can create a new map. Falling off the earth and coming up the chimney, too. I like eating fruit from that crazy world.

    Is “Noby Noby Boy” fun?

    Yes. Poop it out is the most fun.

    If your cat were in “Noby Noby Boy” what would he say?

    “I’m pretending I’m a worm.”

    What do you think of the character, “Boy”?

    I think he is happy. I like to eat flowers. I don’t like to eat houses.

    Have you zoomed out and seen “Girl”, what do you think of her?

    Yes. I like talking to her

    Is there anything else you want to say about the game, “Noby Noby Boy”?

    I like the ballerinas dancing on me. I liked when the fairy came and said ‘loading’, ‘now loading’, ‘loading’, ‘now loading’.

    There you have it, Noby Noby Boy reviewed by a 4-Year-Old Girl, and I think she did a better job than most of the 20+ Year-Old “Game Journalists” with a smaller wordcount, to boot. Also, from now on the game will be referred to as “Poop it out”.

  • feature_tdsquadHey go check out my first set of iPhone game reviews over at atomicgamer! THEY’RE SO AWESOME! THESE ARE THE GAMES THAT GOT REVIEWED!!!!!11111:

    • Wurdle

    • Black and White

    • Skybound

    • Pinball Dreaming

    • TapDefense

    Developers & Publishers, email me promo codes for your games to zakk@nuclearmonster.com!! DO IT OR THE OWL WILL EAT YOU!

  • Don't shit your pants!

    There are basically two kinds of people. Those that find this image amusing, and would like to play the game associated with it (i.e. Me) and those that don’t.

    If you fall into the category of those that find it amusing, click this link to go on and play the flash game called ‘Don’t Shit Your Pants” over at Kongregate. Enjoy!

    If you don’t find it amusing, I am terribly sorry, but there is no game for you.

  • Indie games are cool and fun

    Ahoy folks! I’m fydo and apparently zakk wants me to write some stuff on this silly blog. I like to hang out in the indie games / opensource games crowd, so I’ll try to share any interesting tidbits I pick up on. Meow?

    For instance, I might mention that this weekend there is a weekend sale going on at Steam, featuring 5 pretty awesome indie games. These games are:

    • Eets
    • Gravitron 2
    • I-Fluid
    • Multiwinia
    • Trials 2

    I personally know the developer of Gravitron 2 and he’s a great guy too.

    So I’ll talk a little bit about Gravitron 2. It’s got a really retro look and feel to it, tight controls and a difficulty ramp that reminds me of the NES days. There are over 40 levels in the original game and the game author just recently released a map pack which adds even more. There is another update in the works involving the map editor, but I probably shouldn’t reveal too much about that. Suffice to say, Gravitron 2 is more than worth the $5, and within this indie pack, it’s a steal! (figuratively speaking, of course)

    I’d love to hear your opinions about any of these games in the comments, so flame away, dear readers.

    (Note that I’ll try to avoid turning my posts into advertisements in the future. Hardy har.)

  • Steam Forums Search

    captcha2

    “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”*. Really, can you read that CAPTCHA? Because I can’t. Maybe it is because I’m red-green color blind. Maybe it is because you guys are a bunch of horse’s asses who don’t have a forum for second sight which is why I’m searching to see if any of your Top Men are working on it, on the forum. Whatever the reason, that captcha is unreadable no matter how many times I click refresh. So, “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”*, Valve. Really. When I say “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* what I meant is “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* with your “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* and your “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”*. If that isn’t making it clear, when a significant percentage of the teenage boys that play your games have this color deficiency, then “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* with whomever, but mostly just your mom.

    Also, as a point of how much I am worth to you as a customer, here is that total.

    *All references to swearing, sexual deviation, or other such inappropriate language have been replaced with the phrase “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir.” at the behest of the ESRB. Please click the following age-gate to unlock the swear-filter:

    age-gate