Battlefield 2

You know your fancy ass gaming rig can run this game well, people are still super into it, and it came out almost 5 years ago. I’m still playing it, the patches have fixed it a little but it still takes more time to load a level than Crysis. Though I personally think it is more fun than Crysis.

What is it?

Hook your joystick up, find some fools to play with, and go play THAT, fool!

Time Doctor Dot Org Official Greasemonkey Script

Hello, kids. Old Man Feld here. I’m bringing you today something we’ve been working on for a while now —

greasemonkeyOur official Greasemonkey script! (yayyy)

Anyway, here’s the deal. We’ve got some code on the site and we’ve identified you as being a valued consumer of our content. We like you so much that we’re willing to allow you to test this. Remember, it’s only in Alpha and not all features are implemented yet, but I’m sure you’ll enjoy it nonetheless. We’re really open to feedback and feature suggestions.

Alright, I have to head out for now. You can find it here. And remember kids, before you tap it you must wrap it!

-Old Man Feld

Gang Garrison 2, A Team Fortress 2 De-Make

ganggarrison
I’d heard about it before, but never given it a chance, now I know why I was an idiot. Gang Garrison 2 is an hilariously awesome version of Team Fortress 2, minus the 3D, but including TCP/IP (or UDP perhaps) networking. The music is a series of chiptune recreations, the graphics look like the screenshot after the break. Go play the damn game (local mirror), you fool!

Continue reading “Gang Garrison 2, A Team Fortress 2 De-Make”

Keita Takahashi is Awesome.

noby_noby-pacmanHe updated the Playstation blog today with this image, and the following text, plus some other stuff:

This photo was taken on January 1st when I came in to work to fix bugs.

As you can easily imagine, there was no one in the office that day except for the security guards. I had a lot of fun freely taking pictures with Boy! I remember carrying him to the main entrance laughing and taking pictures of Boy wrapped around the Pac-Man statue. When I was planning on using this photo for the banner, I was told that Pac-Man stood out more and the picture made it look like it was a Pac-Man game. I just answered back saying, “Players may buy the game by mistaking it for a Pac-Man game! Wouldn’t it be nice?”

Also, I finally have an internet connection in my new apartment and have tried Noby Noby Boy for myself. It is quite the thing and should be demonstrative of why more people should own Playstation 3 consoles. Other consoles may have a few interesting games on their digital distribution platforms, but none are as original or creative as Noby Noby Boy Poop it out.

Noby Noby Boy Reviewed by a 4-Year-Old Girl

When I thought about reviewing Noby Noby Boy, the first thing I thought was that everyone would review this unusual gem the usual way, with a score, and all that crap. Well lets leave that kind of thing to the IGN’s, GameSpots, and 1Up’s of the world. Instead, I asked a friend’s 4-Year-Old daughter a few distilled questions about the game.

Her words are blockquoted and my questions are in bold. Occasionally, she performed nonverbal actions, those are in italics.

What is “Noby Noby Boy”?

It’s a game. Noby Noby Boy! (Does a jump.) You eat stuff and poop it out. You can create a new map. Falling off the earth and coming up the chimney, too. I like eating fruit from that crazy world.

Is “Noby Noby Boy” fun?

Yes. Poop it out is the most fun.

If your cat were in “Noby Noby Boy” what would he say?

“I’m pretending I’m a worm.”

What do you think of the character, “Boy”?

I think he is happy. I like to eat flowers. I don’t like to eat houses.

Have you zoomed out and seen “Girl”, what do you think of her?

Yes. I like talking to her

Is there anything else you want to say about the game, “Noby Noby Boy”?

I like the ballerinas dancing on me. I liked when the fairy came and said ‘loading’, ‘now loading’, ‘loading’, ‘now loading’.

There you have it, Noby Noby Boy reviewed by a 4-Year-Old Girl, and I think she did a better job than most of the 20+ Year-Old “Game Journalists” with a smaller wordcount, to boot. Also, from now on the game will be referred to as “Poop it out”.

I should mention that during the course of this interview I searched google for images appropriate to this post. The reason why there is no image even after that is because I hate the internet.

iPhone Game Reviews at AtomicGamer!

feature_tdsquadHey go check out my first set of iPhone game reviews over at atomicgamer! THEY’RE SO AWESOME! THESE ARE THE GAMES THAT GOT REVIEWED!!!!!11111:

  • Wurdle

  • Black and White

  • Skybound

  • Pinball Dreaming

  • TapDefense

Developers & Publishers, email me promo codes for your games to zakk@nuclearmonster.com!! DO IT OR THE OWL WILL EAT YOU!

Congress votes Yes on the No Pant Shitting Vote!

Don't shit your pants!

There are basically two kinds of people. Those that find this image amusing, and would like to play the game associated with it (i.e. Me) and those that don’t.

If you fall into the category of those that find it amusing, click this link to go on and play the flash game called ‘Don’t Shit Your Pants” over at Kongregate. Enjoy!

If you don’t find it amusing, I am terribly sorry, but there is no game for you.

A new blogger and an indie game sale!

Indie games are cool and fun

Ahoy folks! I’m fydo and apparently zakk wants me to write some stuff on this silly blog. I like to hang out in the indie games / opensource games crowd, so I’ll try to share any interesting tidbits I pick up on. Meow?

For instance, I might mention that this weekend there is a weekend sale going on at Steam, featuring 5 pretty awesome indie games. These games are:

  • Eets
  • Gravitron 2
  • I-Fluid
  • Multiwinia
  • Trials 2

I personally know the developer of Gravitron 2 and he’s a great guy too.

So I’ll talk a little bit about Gravitron 2. It’s got a really retro look and feel to it, tight controls and a difficulty ramp that reminds me of the NES days. There are over 40 levels in the original game and the game author just recently released a map pack which adds even more. There is another update in the works involving the map editor, but I probably shouldn’t reveal too much about that. Suffice to say, Gravitron 2 is more than worth the $5, and within this indie pack, it’s a steal! (figuratively speaking, of course)

I’d love to hear your opinions about any of these games in the comments, so flame away, dear readers.

(Note that I’ll try to avoid turning my posts into advertisements in the future. Hardy har.)

You Know What, Valve?

Steam Forums Search

captcha2

“I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”*. Really, can you read that CAPTCHA? Because I can’t. Maybe it is because I’m red-green color blind. Maybe it is because you guys are a bunch of horse’s asses who don’t have a forum for second sight which is why I’m searching to see if any of your Top Men are working on it, on the forum. Whatever the reason, that captcha is unreadable no matter how many times I click refresh. So, “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”*, Valve. Really. When I say “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* what I meant is “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* with your “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* and your “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”*. If that isn’t making it clear, when a significant percentage of the teenage boys that play your games have this color deficiency, then “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir”* with whomever, but mostly just your mom.

Also, as a point of how much I am worth to you as a customer, here is that total.

*All references to swearing, sexual deviation, or other such inappropriate language have been replaced with the phrase “I do not approve of your method of handling this situation, good sir.” at the behest of the ESRB. Please click the following age-gate to unlock the swear-filter:

age-gate